Waking up from a six year haze

Well the day I have been waiting for has come. I will no longer be a 3rd shift who blogs once in a while. I will no longer walk around like a zombie. I will actually be me for once and not some lazy pathetic over tired slob. I will no longer not like me. I haven't liked me in some time. Working 3rds can mentally break you down and physically turn you into a pile ooze.

I have accepted a new job within the company I work for working with academics and kids. I will now be a normal human who works 7 am to 3 pm and sleep in the same bed as my wife for 7 days a week. I am pretty excited about this. Its been six long years of 10:30 pm to 9 am. Its finally over and I can't soak it in enough.
People every night take for granted sleeping in their own bed. I got to sleep in my own bed 3 nights a week. That is 156 days a year. Think about that. That is absurd. It makes you worthless pretty much everyday.

I was keeping up fine until my son was born then things changed... My wife goes to school full time so I would come home and have to watch him all day after staying up all night. Not only was this terrible for me and my well being but I was a useless dad who turned the TV on and tried not to fall a sleep as my son played. This is a big reason I stopped posting on MM so much. I couldn't focus on writing anything at night since my vision would just blur and double as I would struggle to stay awake. Writing for me is just like reading a book. It relaxes me and puts me out. So unless I got some extra sleep or I was feeling better then norm I wasn't going to write anything. Here was my normal day after my 3 days off. Wake at 8:00 am when my son did. Watch him all day until my wife got home at 6 pm. Do family and dinner and go to work at 10:30 pm. We have meetings on the following day so I have to stay until 11 am... So now I am at about 27 hour awake. I would go home and watch my son until my wife got home around 5 pm and maybe 4 pm if I am lucky. So that is about 32-34 hours awake straight. I would then sleep from 5 pm to 10 pm and go back to work and repeat. It was killing me. And it almost did numerous times. I have lost count how many times I have dozed off while driving and almost gotten into an accident. I have been very lucky. I have taken 15 min power naps at many gas stations just to make it home.

Its 3:35 am right now and I have been up since 8 am.. Oh and I have a meeting until 11 am tomorrow. This is the last week of killing my brain.

So many people would say, how do you do it? It crazy how you just like hit this wall and you can't keep your head up but then out of no where you will break through the wall and have a new burst for an hour. When I had Season tickets last season I would head to Ann Arbor on no sleep right after work. I would be having a really hard time staying awake but once I got on US-23 I would get a rush of energy as I could feel the Big House calling me. I only went to a few games and sold the rest since I couldn't pass up the one day I could just go home and go to sleep for 10 hours(I won't get into day sleeping, its sucks). I watched most my games on DVR.

My body? Its goo. I started at 195 lbs and no I am a hefty 220 lbs. At 6'2 it isn't the end of the world but I am not happy with it. I eat so much crap at night to stay awake. My mind? A mess. I can't remember anything anymore. You sit around all alone at night and wonder what you are dying from this week. Worry about this or that. Did I just see a figure out the window? A person? No I am just dozing off again. Seeing things. Wait what did I hear? A child sneaking out? Nope just me nodding off and hitting the remote control on the ground. Nothing seems real and your a step slow with every thought.

I didn't want my son seeing his dad sleep his days away and not being able to be there for special moments. If I hadn't knocked this interview out of the park I'm not sure what I would have done. With my wife a full time slave of school and the hospital(intern) I could never walk away. But I did own that interview and now I can lead a normal life. I now can help kids at work while they are awake and that is a good feeling. I didn't mean to ramble this long post out but its been a long time coming. 3rd shifters will never get their due since its hard to imagine the torture they go through unless you do it. I have no idea if this changes anything with my blog that gets a few ebay posts and MS paints here and there. My motivation will be back. That I can say... So I have no idea. Not like I have a ton of readers but I do enjoy the people that do read.

I start Monday. I am free of this torture. My mind and body will be back. I can now watch Michigan Football and Basketball live. Life is good.

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